[Contains Spoliers]
The Bourne Ultimatum rapped up by Marty in under five mintues:
One day Paul Greengrass decided he wanted to make the ulimate bad ass movie in the world by showing competele ludacris to people. This is the story about a man (Jason Bourne) who's mind was competely erased. Why? Well, we really don't know why, or why he killed people, or how he was suppose to protect his country by doing this but who really cares? Let's make this as mysteries a possible, no one will notice. What we do know is that he wants to find that man (Dr. Albert Hirsch) that erased his mind and kill him. But wait, the CSI and Noah Vosen are there to stop him from reaching that goal! Watch out!
Yeah, somehow the CSI or whatever they are can track down a person in under 20 sconds flat no matter where he is in the world. Looks like 60% of the people around you actually work for the CSI or FBI and plant cameras everywhere. America just happens to know where ever you are--Italy, France, United Kingdom? Yep, they even know when you're sleeping. Yeah, I know it's strange, but once again let's keep this bad ass. Because they have to know where he is since this whole movie has under 500 words, and the only thing that happens is a lot of car chases and a lot of running. Basically they run, shot, kill, kick ass, and move to the next sene where it happens again.
Though, I did fail to mention one place where the FBI don't know where you are. Their base! Yeah that's right! Just 10 mintues after they left their base the nitrous Jason Bourne somehow infratraded it. The devil! Anyways, once he was there he went into Noah Vosen's room and grabbed the high top secret stuff to finally find out where Dr. Albert Hirsch lair is!
Once Jason Bourne goes into his lair he finds out that he agreed to serve under Dr. Albert Hirsch. Therefore, he doesn't kill him. Way to go, Paul Greengrass you made the most pointless and idiotic movie ever! I really love the ending; I had no idea he would actually surivie the 500 feet fall with a shotgun in his chest, but I had a good feeling he might.
What does the world give this movie:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0440963/ 8.5/10 stars! I'll bet it'll win an oscar too.